Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Fuck Brett Myers!... and Sapphire's new update

Myers (he even looks like a douchebag)

Sports fans across the country are making a fuss about the “news” of Mark McGwire’s steroid use. On Monday, McGwire finally told us what we already knew: that while he was rewriting the Major League baseball record books back in the 90s, he was using performance-enhancing drugs. His confession and apology was much too late and half-assed in my opinion for a number of reasons, but I will spare you my Big Mac sermon for now.


While the experts in the media are acting as if that they would rather be fucked in the ass with the fat end of a Louisville Slugger than have McGwire in the Hall of Fame, and continuing their assassination of this man’s character, I believe McGwire should be left alone. He is obviously a cheater, and a liar, and the only reason he is coming clean now is because of his new job with the Cardinals, but many reporters and teammates who have dealt closely with McGwire will tell you that he is a good person. He has a history of being a good teammate as well as a good husband and father.

If there were a drug available that would improve my performance as a porn blogger, giving me the skills to lust after sexy fat chicks in a more productive way, while putting millions of dollars in my pocket in the process, I would probably take it. No, I would definitely take it. This is the logic that has fueled Baseball’s “steroid era.” Players who were simply trying to create a better economic situation for themselves and their families—while the big dogs in MLB looked the other way—should not be demonized. They are cheaters, but they should not be judged so harshly, and, in my humble opinion, every alleged PED user should be allowed into the Hall of Fame if their stats merit it.

PED users are being portrayed in the media as the worst villains in sports, and with every new revelation ESPN jizzes all over itself, and buries us in coverage, but these cheaters are not the real evildoers.

The video below is of recent Houston Astros signee, pitcher Brett Myers. Myers’ voice is the one who calls the reporter a “retard,” and generally the one who sounds the most like a douche bag.

The audio points out very clearly that Myers is an asshole, but the real evidence of his assholery is the 2006 story of Myers beating his wife on the streets of Boston. Myers was arrested for assault after witnesses saw him punch his wife Kim after an argument. He was with the Phillies at the time, and the team faced harsh criticism because of the fact that the team refused to let him go after the incident.

As a fan of the Houston Astros, I am much more pissed about having a wife-beater on my team than I am with any of the PED users that continue to earn major league salaries. A man who takes a drug to better his life is a cheater, but a “man” who hits women is one of the lowest forms of life, and should never be able to cash a major league check. Myers will be vilified forever for his actions by fans and bloggers like me, but as long as he can throw a baseball, he will have a job in MLB. Mark McGwire and other cheaters have done damage to MLB’s reputation, and should take their lumps for it, but it is assholes like Myers, and pro sports’ blatant disregard for the character of their players, that are the real evil. We bitch about steroids, but there is something terribly wrong with the fact that a person can beat their wife, slaughter innocent animals, or drive drunk, and still enjoy the benefits of being a professional athlete.

Fuck you, Brett Myers… and that’s from an Astros fan.

If you read all that shit, you deserve a treat, and Sapphire (above) will more than suffice. Be sure to check out her newest bbwsgoneblack update, which debuts today! I've seen it, and it's spectacular. Of course I have a thing for huge-titted redheads with glasses, but I'm sure you'll like it as well. And those shoes are to die for! Below are more pics. And here is a trailer. Enjoy!

And plumperpass is God!

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